I leave for Vegas on Saturday. I am super excited and at the same time....I'm sad. Why am I sad. Because I didn't lose the weight I was supposed to when I booked this trip. So I won't be walking around in my trampy clothes I planned on wearing (hey, it's Vegas that's what people do there....LOL).
I vow this will be the last event that I look for clothes that FIT instead of clothes that are hot, cute, sassy. I miss the days of grabbing something off the rack and not even bothering to try it on.
Now, I have to try on everything....and I'm buying sizes I never thought I'd buy.....
A friend posted a picture of me from their wedding reception.....I look like....someone I never thought I'd look like.
I oftern wonder if people who haven't seen me in a while think....."she needs to put down the sandwiches".....
174.8 the scale said this morning...10 years ago I was in a size 4......today.....let's just say it's not a size 4....it's not even single digits.
I'm getting old; I can't eat like I used to and it's time for me to face that reality.
I can't eat fast food for 3 meals and expect the scale to not TIP!!
My self-esteem is at a low....a very low low.....
I do not want to be the fat aunt at my niece's wedding next year; nor do I want to be the cousin's fat wife at my DH's cousin's wedding next month.
My head is bouncing off the wall; and instead of blood there is french fries pouring out of my head.
What is more important - french fries or health? Cookies or self-esteem? Chips or my DH's being proud of his hot wife on his arm?
The time is now......
